BITCHIN' IN THE KITCHEN

(Movie Version)


 
    This song, in the film, was sung on Marriage Maze, and is longer than the one featured on the soundtrack to do added dialogue.   It can be found on some bootleg CDRs.
    In the lyrics below, the announcer tells us about prizes Brad and Janet could win.  They are written in italic.
 

Announcer:  ( It looks like Brad and Janet are heavily amazed today.  Here are some more prizes to amaze here on marriage maze)
Brad: Dear blender (You won't blend into the background with this in your home, it sells for $39.99)
        Oh won't you help a first offender. (Prizes are provided by...)
        Oh, toaster (Pop up in the popularity ratings with this one in your home)
        Don't you put the burn on me  (Look at this!)
        Refrigerator, why are we always sooner or later (And it sells for around $1999.99)
        Bitchin in the kitchen or crying in the bedroom all night.
        (Living on the knife edge)
        Dear knife drawer (Stay sharp with this keen knife enhancer)
        Now won't you help me to face life more
        Oh, trashcan (You can't can what the trashcan can)
        Don't you put the dirt on me.
        Oh percolator, why are we always sooner or later. (No toil no trouble)
        Bitchin in the kitchen or crying in the bedroom all night.
 
Janet: Everything used to be okay but I've been had
        And Brad, I'm glad to say, is on his way. (Try a prize computer wise)
        Micro digital awaker, why are we always sooner or later
        Bitchin in the kitchen or crying in the bedroom all night.
        Shower curtain (Wash those blues away in a shower by April Shower)
        Oh won't you help me to be certain.
        Oh toothpaste (Arm yourself some teeth)
        Don't you put the squeeze on me
        Depilitator, why are we always sooner or later
        Bitchin in the kitchen or crying in the bedroom all night

Announcer:    (And now its back to Marriage Maze.  And for those of you who are Dentonvale watchers here's our surprise guest.  Yes.  And here's Bert!)
Bert:   Hey folks, its Ricky from the rest home!
Ricky:  Hey Bert!
Bert:   Hey Ricky!
Ricky:  I've come for Mr. Majors.
Bert:   Brad will learn how to care in a surgical chair.
Ricky:  Nothing uh serious I hope.
Janet:  Oh no no, just a routine checkup.
Bert:   Just a routine checkup, eh viewers?

Janet:  Tell me, spectator, why are we always sooner or later
        Bitchin in the kitchen or crying in the bedroom all night
 
Announcer:    (Ha Ha Ha! Well, Bert's done it again, another rocky marriage is headed for intensive care.)
Bert:   The subject is committed!  As are we all...