The "Ultimate"
Audience Participation Script
For Shock Treatment

Scene 14: Little Black Dress


(T
(Song - "Little Black Dress")
 
 

                    (SHOUT: "The Versace Song") and/or

                    (SHOUT: "How long have you been gay?")

Cosmo: Ever since I was a little boy

          Dressing up

                    (ECHO: "Jacking off")

          has always been my greatest joy

          But when its time to be discreet

          There's one thing you just can't

                   (ECHO: "...I love to")

          beat

                   (ECHO: "Come on baby, beat my meat")

          And that's a strapless backless classical

          Little black dress

                   (SHOUT: "Good old fashioned nightmare fuel") or

                    (SHOUT: "Take it away O.J.") or

                    (SHOUT: "How do you perform an abortion?")

          Well first you go rip rip rip

          Then you go snip snip snip

          Then you whip in a zip zip zip

                   (ECHO: "Then your pussy goes drip drip drip")

          And split it up to the

                   (ECHO: "Runnin' down on your...")

          hip hip hip

          And as you strip strip strip

          You shiver, quiver for that soft

                   (ECHO: "crotch")

          caress

          As you slip slip slip

          Into that little black dress.

                   (SHOUT: "Cover that shit up, it stinks")

(Cosmo drapes a black sheet of material over Janet's head)

Nation: Ah, hoopla.

(Scene shift to Bert and Nation going into Janet's dressing room.)

                   (SHOUT: "Bert, say something we don't understand")

Bert: Ever since I was the eina kliena heiren

                   (SHOUT: "Hey, I've got a hairy recliner!")

          It was the cordon bleu for which I am most caring

                   (SHOUT: "What?")

          And the one taste treat so sweet

                   (SHOUT OVER next few lines: "Somewhere around here I left a freezer full of Always Save Dog Food…")

                    (SHOUT: "Someone stole my ants from my ant farm…")

          That really can't be beat

                   (SHOUT: "…and put them in a bowl in the fridge")

          Is what we have ya, how you are, caviar

(Bert grabs a bowl of caviar from the fridge)

          that little black mess.

                   (SHOUT: "That's disgusting")

(Cosmo and Janet enter. She's wearing a new black dress)

                   (SHOUT: "So's that")

Cosmo: Hey! Viola!

                    (SHOUT: "That's the dress my aunt was buried in") or

                    (SHOUT: "That's no hat, that's a space station")

                    (NOTE: Next chorus uses same ECHOES as mentioned in first chorus)

                    (SHOUT: "What's it like to fuck a virgin?")

Janet: Well first you go rip rip rip

          Then you go snip snip snip

          Then you whip in a zip zip zip

          Split it up to the hip hip hip

(Janet gets up on the table and starts dancing and breaking things)

                    (SHOUT: "That's White Star Line property. You'll pay for that")

          Then as you strip strip strip

          You quiver, shiver for that soft caress

          As you slip slip slip

          Into that little black dress

          That minimal (minimal)

          criminal (criminal)

          siniful little black dress.

Nation: Lets face it Mac that basic black is coming back

(Janet strikes a pose)

                   (SHOUT: "Vogue")

Bert: Lets face it Mac that basic black is coming back

(Janet strikes a pose)

                   (SHOUT: "Vogue")

Bert & Nation: Lets face it Mac that basic black is coming back

(Janet strikes a pose)

                   (SHOUT: "Vogue")

Janet: That minimal (minimal)

                   (SHOUT: "Welcome to Olan Mills")

          criminal (criminal)

          siniful

                   (SHOUT: "Time for a family portrait")

          Little black dress.

(Group sits on furniture in a pose reminiscent of Rocky Horror's Sweet Transvestite throne scene)


GO TO SCENE 15

RETURN TO AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION SCRIPT MAIN PAGE

RETURN TO THE SHOCK TREATMENT NETWORK